Why am I here?
by Wojo
Summary: Greg wakes up in a psych ward with no memory of why he's there


Why am I here?

Summary: Greg wakes up in a psych ward with no memory of why he's there.

Greg opened his eyes and looked around, he didn't recognize where he was. The room was white and sterile and there was padding on the walls. He realized he was in a hospital room but why was he here? How did he get here? He could not remember. He scratched his head and tried to think, was he in an accident? Is that why he couldn't remember? He felt no bumps, cuts, or tender areas on his head and this only confused him more.

He got out of bed, he noticed he was wearing a hospital gown as well. He thought maybe he could find answers at the nurses station. He walked to the door and reached for the handle, it was locked. Why was he locked in? What was going on he wondered. Then he noticed a nurse outside the door and called to her.

"Excuse me nurse, can you help me?"

"What can I do for you, Mr Sanders (she knew his name)?"

"Where am I" He asked

"You are on the psychiatric floor at Desert Palms hospital"

"Desert palms" he repeated "Why am I here?"

"You don't remember why your here Mr Sanders?"

"You can call me Greg" he said "And no, I don't remember"

"I'll go find your doctor, he will explain everything." She said and disappeared down the hall.

Greg stepped away from the door to wait for the doctor and hopefully some answers. He looked around the room again, there was a hospital bed and next to that a nightstand, the only thing on it was a pitcher of water and a plastic cup. There was no phone, there was no window, he didn't see any get well cards, balloons, or flowers anywhere. The room was lit by bright florescent lights.

Moments later the doctor entered the room, he was middle age with a light beard and short graying hair. He seemed pleasant enough.

"Good afternoon Mr Sanders, I am Dr Petigrew. I've been assigned to your case."

"Case?" Greg asked "What am I doing here?"

"You don't remember?"

"No, I have no clue why I'm here or how I got here. That IS why I asked" he said annoyed.

"What is the last thing you DO remember, Mr Sanders?"

"Its Greg, and I remember it was the end of my shift and I was getting ready to go to breakfast with...Nick. Was I in an accident or something?" Where is Nick? He must be worried about me."

"Nick?" Dr Petigrew asked while reaching in his pocket and removing a small notebook.

"Yeah, he's my boyfriend" Greg said sheepishly "We had plans after work, where is he can I see him now?"

The doctor read something in his notebook. "Nick Stokes?" he asked.

"Yes, that's him, where is he? Please, I really need to see him."

"I'm afraid that's not possible, Mr Sanders."

"Why can't I see him, I know he must be waiting to see me."

Dr Petigrew cleared his throat, he seemed a bit nervous as if he were searching for the right words.

"I'm sorry Mr Sanders, but Mr Stokes was killed this morning."

Greg's mouth fell open and his legs began to shake, he could not believe what he just heard.

"What!..."Greg cried "He's dead...Nick is dead! That can't be! How?...Why?...Were we both in an accident? Is that why I can't remember? Is that why I am here?"

"Not exactly Mr Sanders, This will come as a shock but the reason you are here is because it was you who killed Mr Stokes".

Greg's eyes widened in horror, did he just hear right! Did he really say he killed Nick?

"NO!" Greg screamed " I couldn't...I wouldn't have...hurt him, I love him! This is a mistake! I DIDN'T KILL HIM! I DIDN'T!" He sobbed. "I'd never do such a thing!"

"Nevertheless, you did Mr Sanders."

"It's not true! IT'S NOT!"

"Your co-workers witnessed the act, it happened in front of all of them according to your supervisor..."

Greg interrupted him "It can't be true, We were going out to breakfast to celebrate our anniversary! I wouldn't have killed him. I love him."

"You are not remembering correctly Mr Sanders" Flipping through his notes. "According to Mr Grissom Nick ended your relationship and he did so in front your co-workers. He also mentioned that he thought it was very uncharacteristic and insensitive of him, he found Nick's behavior rather odd."

"NO! That can't be ! Nick would never do that to me, He loves me!"

"Mr Grissom also said that was not the case, he said Nick told you he didn't love you and that he never did. He said you meant nothing to him except a good lay, and he was going to settle down with a nice southern girl his parents introduced him to."

"Your lying! He would never give in to his parents idea of normal! He said nothing would come between us! He promised we'd always be together." He said still sobbing.

"Well, obviously he broke that promise didn't he? Isn't that why you snapped? Isn't that why you went into the ballistics lab and took a loaded gun and shot him dead in front of everyone before they could stop you Mr Sanders?"

"NO! I DIDN'T KILL HIM! YOUR A FUCKING LIAR! " Greg screamed and backed up against the wall and slid down it and put his hands over his ears.

"Mr Sanders, the sooner you realize the truth and accept responsibility for what you did the sooner your fractured mind can heal. You must listen to me."

"NOOOOOOOO! I am not listening to your lies! This isn't happening, I don't believe it!

He began to scream.

"Greg! Greg! Its ok..."

Greg bolted straight up from his bed screaming and Nick reached for him, shaking his shoulders slightly.

"Greg! Wake up, Greg!"

Greg finally fully awake was breathing hard and shivering, his body soaked in sweat and his heart pounding.

"Greg, calm down you had a bad dream."

"Nick, is it really you?"

"Shhhh baby I'm here, your safe now."

Greg threw his arms around him and Nick lay back pulling Greg with him, holding him close. His touch sent relief through Greg's body and he began to calm as Nick rubbed his back and placed gentle kisses on his face.

"You do love me, Don't you Nicky?

"With all my heart G. "

"Promise?"

"Greg, you know I love you more than anything in this world, believe me."

"I do believe you, I'm just feeling freaked out cuz of the dream. I'll be fine, just need to relax and get it out of my head."

"Damn G, that must have been some dream, feel like talking about it?"

"No, I'd rather not. I just want to forget and lie here in your arms where I feel safe again."

"You are safe baby, why don't we try and get back to sleep."

"Ok, I'll try Nicky."

They held each other close as they drifted back to sleep.

Note: This story was slightly inspired by the movie Gothica and my own warped imagination. Hope you enjoyed it.


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